One is Never Enough...

Hello fellow followers, fans, formal acquaintances, and fractured heart fixers:

A great bunch of events have happened that need your attention, consideration and emotional evaluation.

Let's start at the very beginning (a very good place to start).  One year ago (April 2014) I had a TIA T2 stroke that left me recovering in the hospital for a few days.

Now in the present, I have had another stroke this past Sunday (08-03-2015) and was taken to the hospital by my now girlfriend Niki. She sacrificially gave time to get me there, get me food (aside from the Hospital offerings), and just supported me in my pain and difficulty.

Next we have the final 'prognosis' from the staff involved after bloodwork, monitoring, MRI, MRA, and direct questioning.  The University Hospital in West Chester resolved that a poor/restricted flow in several areas (caused by previous Radiation treatments) caused the transient stroke effect.

Once I was injected numerous times (now bruised) with blood thinners as a precaution, my condition remained stable long enough for me to sneak (check -out) out of the hospital and head home for some real rest.

If that was all the news I had...then there would be joy...but hang in there.

This very morning I had a orthopedic doctor follow-up for some pain and restricted range of motion in both shoulders.  He kindly noted that there was no tendon, muscle or other tears or damage.  However, he then proceeded to tell me that I had a rare condition known as 'Avascular necroses in the humeral heads'.  This is the ball portion at the end of your upper arm bone that is held neatly inside your shoulder socket.  Basically, what the necrosis does is deteriorate the head/ball section of bone until it starts to break down and fail as a heavily used unit until a solution is implemented.

So far, all I have heard is that a rebuild of the shoulder would be the best route.  This involves severing the existing ball of bone material as it enters the shoulder socket and replace it with a metal or otherwise strong replica.  This would also require strengthening the socket area to accept a metal joint instead of bone material.

While I wait for answers from my Ortho as he searches the minds of his colleagues in specialty areas and even in other states, this puts me in a funny place.  Here's what I mean:

Here I am processing my second stroke event and have to unknowingly combine it with a potential double shoulder rebuild that may or may not need regular future maintance.

NOW!  That's a lot to handle.  Even with my experienced past, it is still gnawing at me.  My solution?  I have already began to journal my feelings and discuss how this affects my life and kids with other friends/family and/or people I can trust with that level of vulnerability.  The final step in the 'new walk' is to resolve a behavioral/filtering device in my person.  This ensures challenges and difficulties during this time are met with a prepared, organized, and consistent approach all the while spreading a message of love, learning and encouragement using a filter of hope, love and peace.

Please spread the message of HOPE!!

Stay Strong...Sincerely,
Leif